2021 new arrival Shameless: wholesale A Case for Not Feeling Bad wholesale About Feeling Good (About Sex) outlet online sale

2021 new arrival Shameless: wholesale A Case for Not Feeling Bad wholesale About Feeling Good (About Sex) outlet online sale

2021 new arrival Shameless: wholesale A Case for Not Feeling Bad wholesale About Feeling Good (About Sex) outlet online sale

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Product Description

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Raw, intimate, and timely—a no-holds-barred celebration of our bodies that flies in the face of antiquated ideas about sex and gender.
 
“A triumph.”—Glennon Doyle • “One of the most important, life-changing books I’ve ever read.”—Rachel Held Evans, author of Searching for Sunday and Inspired
 
Negative messages about sex come from all corners of society: from the church, from the media, from our own families. As a result, countless people have suffered pain, guilt, and judgment. In this instant bestseller, Nadia Bolz-Weber unleashes her critical eye and her vulnerable yet hopeful soul on the harmful conversations about sex that have fed our shame.
 
Bolz-Weber offers no simple amendments or polite compromises. Instead, this modern-day reverend calls for an inclusivity that empowers us to be loyal to people and, perhaps most important, ourselves. “Christianity is not a program for avoiding mistakes,” she writes. “It is a faith of the guilty.” With an alternative understanding of Scripture passages that have been weaponized against Christians for decades, Bolz-Weber reminds us that sexual flourishing can and should be for all genders, all bodies, and all humans. She shares stories, poetry, and Scripture that wage war on perpetual anxiety around sex by celebrating sexuality in all its forms and recognizing it for the gift that it is.
 
If you’ve been mistreated, confused, angered, and/or wounded by shaming sexual messages, this one is for you.

Review

Shameless is a triumph. Nadia Bolz-Weber returns to readers the gift toxic religion and consumer culture stole: the gift of sexuality. Her wisdom is unparalleled, her vulnerability touching, her storytelling masterful, and her perspective both ancient and fresh. Shameless will give its readers their joy, relationships, and freedom back.”
—Glennon Doyle, author of #1 New York Times Bestseller LOVE WARRIOR, founder and president of Together Rising
 
Shameless is one of the most important, life-changing books I’ve ever read. Expertly-crafted and lovingly delivered, it serves as both a bomb and a balm—blowing up the lies religion teaches about sex and tenderly healing the wounds those messages have inflicted. Pastoral and prophetic, Shameless weaves together history, theology, biblical studies, personal narrative, and sex ed, without ever losing sight of its most important aim—honoring the dignity of actual human beings living actual, messy and beautiful lives. It’s Nadia Bolz-Weber’s best book yet. And that’s saying something.”
—Rachel Held Evans, author of Searching for Sunday and Inspired
 
“If the conversation around sex in the Church has felt like a small, cramped room to you, brace yourself: Nadia Bolz-Weber is about to kick in the door, hustle you outside, and burn down the room as you march out into the fresh air. This irreverent, bold, and authentic book is deeply centered in love and the transforming goodness of God. If ever there was a time for the Church to disrupt the world''s broken notions around sex, gender, masculinity, and power with this sort of a shameless reformation, it is now. And Nadia is the loving, hopeful, wise, take-no-prisoners disruptor we''ve been waiting for.”
—Sarah Bessey, author of Jesus Feminist and Out of Sorts

 
“Nadia has an amazingly faith-filled way to say good things in a hard way and hard things in a good way. She does it again with one of our most wounding, dangerous, and needed subjects—Christian gender and sexual teaching! This will heal many.”
—Fr. Richard Rohr, O.F.M., Center for Action and Contemplation, author of Falling Upward

 
"Nadia Bolz Weber returns with her page-turning, vulnerable storytelling, this time with her sights set squarely on purity culture. She unravels the problematic, toxic frameworks around sexuality – the burden of which many of us still carry today – and offers us the freedom we need to say no to shame. If you know Nadia''s work, you know that she is fearless. In Shameless, we all benefit from her bravery."
—Austin Channing Brown, author of I’m Still Here: Black Dignity in a World Made for Whiteness

About the Author

Nadia Bolz-Weber first hit the New York Times list with her 2013 memoir—the bitingly honest and inspiring Pastrix—followed by the critically acclaimed New York Times bestseller Accidental Saints in 2015. A former stand-up comic and a recovering alcoholic, Bolz-Weber is the founder and former pastor of a Lutheran congregation in Denver, House for All Sinners and Saints. She speaks at colleges and conferences around the globe.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

Invocation

The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all. 

And also with you.

The week Prince died, I was flying to Charlotte, North Carolina, to speak to a group of Methodists. That same week, the state legislature of North Carolina voted in the so-called bathroom bill, which stated that people must use the bathroom that corresponds to the gender on their driver’s license. As I stuffed my carry-on bag beneath the seat in front of me, I thought of this hideous bill and the little plan I had concocted to protest it. My bag contained a roll of Scotch tape and half a dozen sheets of paper, all which bore—in huge purple print—the androgynous symbol for Prince’s name.

The plane took off, and I looked out the window. We were traveling over the dry plains of eastern Colorado, thirty thousand feet above a dot matrix of green and brown circles that revealed the geometry of industrial agriculture. As a city girl who doesn’t know a thing about farming, I’ve always found those green circles puzzling. Why would farmers plant circles of crops in lots that are square?

When I looked into it later, I discovered that in 1940, just twenty-nine miles from the spot where my plane made its way into the crisp Colorado sky, a man named Frank Zybach invented the center-pivot irrigation system, essentially revolutionizing farming in America. In his system, the watering equipment turns on a pivot, allowing sprinklers to water crops in a circular pattern. The crops aren’t planted in circles; they’re just watered that way. The water never gets to the crops in the corners.

When I arrived at the Charlotte airport, I went about my project of taping the purple Prince symbols over bathroom signs that read “Men” and “Women.” Then I went to church.
  
The day after I returned home, I sat on the edge of the stage at House for All Sinners and Saints (HFASS), the Denver church I pastor. My parishioner Meghan and I were watching the church’s monthly community meal take place. Groups of mismatched people of differing ages and sexual and gender orientations were situated at twelve circular tables throughout the room, eating chili out of Styrofoam bowls.

Meghan, a large transwoman with long, thin hair and a face and figure that she admits do not allow her to “pass,” has enough social anxiety to make sitting at a communal table a non-starter, so she usually makes her own place on the edge of the stage. Some Sundays, rather than join the fray, I hang with her and talk comic books.

That day, as our legs hung off the stage, I brought up something that had been on my mind lately. “Hey, Meghan, I read my old Christian sex-ed book this morning for the first time in maybe forty years.” She laughed, and I went on. “It taught me that God’s plan is for everyone to be a hetero-sexual, cis-gender Christian who never has sex with anyone until they marry their one true love and make babies.”*

We both laughed. Then I shook my head. “I mean, I do think there are genuinely those kinds of people out there.”

Meghan held up her hand and touched her thumb to the rest of her purple nail-polished fingers. “Sure there are. And this is how small that circle is.”

If you were to draw a circle that represents all the people on the planet, and then inside it draw another small circle to represent the people who live according to “God’s plan,” then, well, very few people on the planet fit in that circle. Meghan doesn’t fit in that circle. I don’t fit in that circle. Also not included in the circle are divorced people, people in unhappy marriages, people who have sex before marriage, people who masturbate, asexuals, gay people, bisexuals, people who are not Christian, people who are gender non-binary . . .

If that’s “God’s plan,” then God planned poorly. 

Maybe you don’t fit into that circle, either. God planted so many of us in the corners, yet the center-pivot irrigation of the church’s teachings about sex and sexuality tends to exclude us. Many of us were taught that if you do not fit inside the circle of the church’s behavioral codes, God is not pleased with you, so we whittled ourselves down to a shape that could fit those teachings, or we denied those parts of ourselves entirely. The lusty parts. The kinky parts. The gay parts. The unwanted-pregnancy parts. The unfulfilled parts.

But our sexual and gender expressions are as integral to who we are as our religious upbringings are. To separate these aspects of ourselves—to separate life as a sexual being from a life with God—is to bifurcate our psyche, like a musical progression that never comes to resolution.

In the ten years I’ve been pastor at HFASS, I’ve known young married couples who did what the church told them and “waited,” only to discover that they could not, on the day of their wedding, flip a switch in their brains and in their bodies and suddenly go from relating to sex as sinful and dirty and dangerous to relating to sex as joyful and natural and God-given. I’ve known single women who didn’t have sex until they were forty and now have absolutely no idea how to manage the emotional aspect of a sexual relationship. I’ve heard middle-aged women admit that they still can’t make themselves wear a V-neck because as teenagers they were told female modesty was the best protection from unwanted male sexual advances. I’ve seen gay men who never reported the sexual abuse they experienced in the church because the church told them being gay was a sin. I’ve heard stories from women who experienced marital rape after getting married at twenty years old (because if you have to wait until marriage to have sex, then you hurry that shit up) but got the message from their church that because there is a verse in the Bible that says women should be subject to their husbands, it was not actually rape.

It doesn’t feel very difficult to draw a direct line between the messages many of us received from the church and the harm we’ve experienced in our bodies and spirits as a result. So my argument in this book is this: we should not be more loyal to an idea, a doctrine, or an interpretation of a Bible verse than we are to people. If the teachings of the church are harming the bodies and spirits of people, we should rethink those teachings.

Five hundred years ago, Martin Luther took a hard look at the harm in his own parishioners’ spiritual lives, specifically their torment from trying to fulfill the sacramental obligations that the church determined would appease an angry God. Seeing this, Luther dared to think that the Gospel—the story of God coming to humanity in Jesus of Nazareth, and speaking to us the words of life—could free his parishioners from the harm their own church had done them. Luther was less loyal to the teachings of the church than he was to people, and this helped spark what is now known as the Protestant Reformation.

I know that there will be those who do not wish to rethink their ideas about sexual ethics, gender, orientation, extramarital sex, and the inherent goodness of the human body. Maybe some people reading this will look at their own lives and in their own churches and see only happy, straight couples who have fulfilling monogamous sex and who glow with the satisfaction of “living in God’s special plan for humanity.” I don’t know. Maybe. I don’t go to your church and I do not live your life. So if the traditional teachings of the church around sex and the body have caused no harm in the lives of the people around you, and have even provided them a plan for true human flourishing, then this book probably is not for you. (Good news, though: the Christian publishing world is your oyster. There you’ll find no lack of books to uphold and even help you double down on your beliefs.)

This book is for everyone else. It is water, I hope, for those planted in the corners. It is for anyone who has had to keep their love life secret. It is for all those who have been good and done everything right in the eyes of the church, and yet still have a sex life minus the fireworks and magic that were promised them if they just “waited.” It is for the parents of the gay son, parents who love and support him because they know he is neither a mistake nor an aberrant sinner, and as a result of that support have become outsiders in their own church. This book is for everyone who ever felt ashamed of their sexual nature because of what someone told them in God’s name. This book is for anyone who has walked away from Christianity and yet still is secretly into Jesus and always will be. This book is for anyone who has passed the traditional teachings of the church on sex to their own kids and now regrets it. This book is for the newly divorced man or woman who desires to be a caring and thoughtful lover, yet wonders: Do the rules I learned in youth group still apply to me now? This book is for the young Evangelical who silently disagrees with their church’s stance on sex and sexual orientation, yet feels alone in that silence. This book is for anyone who wonders, even subconsciously: Has the church obsessed over this too much? Do we really think we’ve gotten it right? 

I believe strongly that the church, in general, has absolutely not gotten it right.

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Kindle Customer
1.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Really?
Reviewed in the United States on February 15, 2019
I don''t know quite how to give stars to this book. I was anxious to read it and found it interesting. I was surprised at her wholesale trashing of traditional sexual values. Being one of those people who believed premarital sex was not part of God''s best plan and being one... See more
I don''t know quite how to give stars to this book. I was anxious to read it and found it interesting. I was surprised at her wholesale trashing of traditional sexual values. Being one of those people who believed premarital sex was not part of God''s best plan and being one with zero hangups about sex on my wedding night I don''t identify with some of her rationale. I regret the grief caused by the church in the name of Christ about sex. I also regret that she didn''t give more value to the joys of monogamous, faithful sex. I think she bends scripture to fit her view that any kind of sex that doesn''t hurt someone else is just fine. This is the third book by Nadia Bolz Weber that I have read. I personally find no value added by her vulgar language. I can''t get away from Ephesians 4:29 -- Don''t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. (NLT)
308 people found this helpful
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Amazon Customer
1.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Look Elsewhere
Reviewed in the United States on February 27, 2019
Like others, I too ordered and read this book looking for wisdom. Yes, we need to have new conversations about sexuality and what it means to follow Jesus. But, I found no serious or critical interaction with either scripture or culture. Instead, the book reads like a (not... See more
Like others, I too ordered and read this book looking for wisdom. Yes, we need to have new conversations about sexuality and what it means to follow Jesus. But, I found no serious or critical interaction with either scripture or culture. Instead, the book reads like a (not so) thinly veiled justification of her own behavior, an apologetic for her own journey. Sadly, while she claims to offer freedom and healing, I believe she will lead people along a pathway toward deeper pain. She promises healing of the broken places, but some of us live downstream and have already seen the sadness and misery wrought by the way she advocates. (I hear deep sadness in her story and feel genuine love, compassion, and heartbreak for her.) If you are looking for a serious and thoughtful study, please try reading either Divine Sex by Jonathan Grant or A Better Story by Glynn Harrison.
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Jennifer Lambert
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
We need a sexual reformation in the church.
Reviewed in the United States on January 29, 2019
My marriages were pretty disastrous. Counselors, both Christian and secular, told me to just allow my husband all the sex he wanted, whenever and however he wanted it - and all would be better. Trite tips on how to parrot his requests to improve communication. I was always... See more
My marriages were pretty disastrous. Counselors, both Christian and secular, told me to just allow my husband all the sex he wanted, whenever and however he wanted it - and all would be better. Trite tips on how to parrot his requests to improve communication. I was always the aggressor, refusing to back down in my admonition that communication and sex weren''t the real problems. My first husband was addicted to pornography. My second was mentally ill. But somehow, they were victims.

I researched and did all the self-help - secular and churchy. I dove down that evangelical rabbit hole. I''ve been divorced (gasp!) and church members just wanted to pray for reconciliation (no!). I thought purity culture might be the answer. (It''s not.)

I tried to be the perfect Christian wife. I am not a quiet meek little mouse. I was ostracized, criticized, alienated for being myself. A cis straight white woman - homemaker and homeschooler. I can''t even imagine what others face.

I''m just really tired of it all. Something has to change.

I have three daughters and a son. What narrative about sexuality do I want them to learn? From whom do I want them to learn about it? It''s important to do more than have The Talk. How do I help my kids make sense of it all? I want them to have healthy relationships. It has to be an ongoing conversation and I have to learn alongside my kids and have no fear.

Sex sells. Sex permeates our society. Sex affects all our relationships - with coworkers, acquaintances, authority figures. People who see everything in black and white say just always avoid being alone with someone of the opposite sex, as if that protects everyone from abuse, assault, accusation.

We need a sexual reformation in the church.

I preordered the book and received a galley copy from the publisher, Convergent/Penguin Random House.
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Elley Willham
3.0 out of 5 stars
True Story and Shameless
Reviewed in the United States on February 4, 2019
20 years ago we started homeschooling our kids. I discovered I was an unschooler. Eventually, I learned there were different styles and flavors to homeschooling Some appealed to me others didn''t. (Hang with me...this relates to Nadia''s Shameless). Eventually, I blended... See more
20 years ago we started homeschooling our kids. I discovered I was an unschooler. Eventually, I learned there were different styles and flavors to homeschooling Some appealed to me others didn''t. (Hang with me...this relates to Nadia''s Shameless). Eventually, I blended some ingredients and found the right homeschooling cocktail for us. Halfway into this journey a TV show that featured a homeschooling family with a lots of kids hit the media. I have no doubt this family believed they were doing the world and homeschoolers a service by letting millions peek into their family, their style of homeschooling and their version of looking like Christ. I could barely watch. This wasn''t us yet I knew we were going to be lumped into this category of conservative homeschooling. Young families in our church wondered why anyone would make this choice. Yet, only by God''s kindness to us, our kids seem to wear homeschooling fairly well. They''re far from perfect but are pretty normal, fun people, are free and love you whether you are like them or not. They swear when needed and drink with friends after small group. On most days, they love Jesus and tell me they want to homeschool their kids someday. It seems that in some small way our family has caused a few young people having children in our church to at least wonder if homeschooling might be something to consider. I''m surprised when that happens.

This out of hand dismissal of homeschooling makes me sad and I wonder how we got here. My husband is a social worker as am I. From the beginning, we wanted to have emotionally and spiritually healthy children. Like many parents, we cared deeply that we wouldn''t damage our kids. We now know that was inevitable but at least we prayed, read the scriptures, apologized a lot and learned all we could. We wanted to provide an environment where our 3 kids could be kids and explore all that they were on the inside as well as out. We shielded them from religion and we wanted them to really know each other as siblings. We wanted them to learn at their own pace without comparison. This turned out to be a good thing because my oldest didn''t read till he was 10. He''s in medical school now. For the most part, he never bought into the idea that he was behind. We watched the pressures and the rigorous schedules kids kept and knew traditional education would make it difficult to process their inner worlds or to learn at their own pace. We''re not saying this is the right choice for everyone but, we wonder if it''s a good choice for some. Our story is by and large untold. We are sad for the hit that homeschooling has taken. It seems lines have been drawn. I''m not trying to sell homeschooling, at least not that I am aware of, but to draw attention to how we have been sent to the margin.

Again, hang with me. Nadia talks a lot about (rails against?) the purity movement. About 12-14 years ago, we were in a souvenir shop at some caverns and my three boys were taken with the rings. They were affordable and they decided a ring would be their souvenir of choice. By this time, we were in homeschool co-ops and hobnobbing with other homeschooling families. What I''ve loved and still love about this community of 300-450 is that people from very different backgrounds, Catholic to Protestant, liberal to conservative, religious and non-religious, and a lot in between come together to share the privilege we still have in this country to home educate. One of my boys had heard someone talk about wearing a ring to say they wanted to wait to have sex till they found a wife someday. The three of them went out in the woods to Narnia complete with a log kitchen where they made sticks and leaf stews. There they pledged their undying devotion to their future loves and then came in and told us. Sigh. I knew those rings would be associated with the purity movement which I found alarming.

My two older kids eventually shed the rings realizing the association. I''ve been listening to Nadia''s book, Shameless, this week. My heart has been heavy for my third boy who continues to wear his ring. He must have been seven? when they pledged their undying love. I don''t think he even knew what sex was but he loved his big brothers. He is 19 now and he''s up to speed. This week I got a chance to talk to him about it. I asked him if he knew the history of the ring. He said he had no idea what the purity movement was, had never heard of it. I explained and filled him in on some of the methods the movement used to shame young people. I explained there are groups of people who come together to talk about the damage that it did and how difficult it has been to enjoy their God-given desires. I told him it was up to him but he should know what the history of the ring is and how it might appear that he''s supporting something, I know from previous conversations, he might not want to support. He told me why he wears it and what he said was innocent, authentic and beautiful. He looked at his ring and he looked sad, then he nodded and walked upstairs. To be honest, I worry that he will be judged, categorized and misunderstood. I know how this would shame and hurt him.

What makes me sad is that I know some of the young people in our church are listening to Nadia (as am I). I wonder if there''s a way to talk about those of us who have been misguided (and aren''t we all) in a way that paves the way for understanding and unity. I get it that the church has hurt people. We have screwed up. I sit in my counseling office 20 hours a week and I hear the stories. But, I wonder if there''s a way to raise awareness and shed light, without perpetuating more intolerance. I love Nadia''s message of embracing those who have been rejected by the church and rethinking how we got to this place to begin with. And I too want more Christ followers to stand in the gap, to challenge perceptions and befriend and sit with those we''ve hurt. As we invite others to the gap, what I am thinking after 35 years on this journey, is that we''re all getting it wrong in some way. We might be getting a couple things close to right, but, looking back and realizing how wrong we''ve gotten it in the past, humbles me. Why is it different now? Why would I be different? Why are you different? Can I be absolutely sure that my interpretation is the right interpretation? Shouldn''t we be sobered by our potential to mislead? On the vast landscape of all there is to interpret in the scriptures, and generally know and understand, what we comprehend amounts to about a blade of grass. No one can be completely sure and if they think they are, they run the risk of doing great harm. After all, didn''t well meaning people do this very thing all throughout history? (And asking these questions, most likely won''t set you up to sell books.) So, how do we seek change without repeating history?

I''m doing my best to keep it to myself but, I hope my son will decide to take off his ring, even if he doesn''t really want to. The more people listen to Nadia’s anger toward and intolerance of conservatives the more likely they are to join in her anger (and disgust?) and the more my son and others like him, stand in harm''s way. I don''t think this is her intention. I think she intends for her anger to be at injustice but unfortunately, if we''re not careful, it gets directed at people. I think she intends to draw attention to how terribly hurt people have been by (her version) of bad teaching. It is her version (much of which I agree with) because isn''t everything we read someone''s version? Unfortunately, we know from history, that people get incensed as they rant and rally against an injustice, find others who feel the same, and from the pain they have experienced, become blind to how they are hurting others all in the name of righting a wrong.

Now I''m in my 50s, I''ve been a long-standing egalitarian, I love Anne Lamott and Don Miller and I care deeply about our pride. I don''t know what it looks like in the heart of others but I do know what it can look like in me. I like to think I''m right. I know that I need to qualify what I say with this is my version and it might be wrong (at least in my mind or by how I listen and ask questions)...but I often don''t. If we''re not doing that, we are running the risk of inspiring another generation of intolerant, angry, harsh or dismissive people and we will create a new shamed or oppressed population. If others are looking to us as a leader (especially one hoping to lead others to find more of Jesus), don''t we want to lead them to love all people well, especially those who don''t believe what we believe? I am concerned that those of us who feel liberally enlightened don''t love and listen for understanding to our conservative brothers and sisters. We don''t get a pass. It''s easy to love people who are like us but, can we welcome, care for and love those who hold viewpoints that are appalling to us? In that space, conversations that lead to change have a chance. Be careful Nadia, please. We can unknowingly create more hurt, hatred and division, the opposite of the very thing we are hoping to stand for.
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Kyliegirl
1.0 out of 5 stars
I''d hoped for more
Reviewed in the United States on February 25, 2019
I was SO disappointed in this book. I''m a huge fan of Bolz-Weber''s previous two books, so requested this with great anticipation. In the past, I loved the way she wove personal stories in and around a clear understanding of theology. Her self-selected title of "Public... See more
I was SO disappointed in this book. I''m a huge fan of Bolz-Weber''s previous two books, so requested this with great anticipation. In the past, I loved the way she wove personal stories in and around a clear understanding of theology. Her self-selected title of "Public Theologian" seemed earned.

SHAMELESS is a clear departure from this standard. It is downright strange how the author just chucks away entire portions of scripture that don''t serve her sense of the way things should be, with a bizarre attitude of, "Let''s just agree that those parts are wrong." This book is intellectually lazy, which is such a shame, because it would be great to have a deep dive into these thorny, complicated questions, and really wrestle with how personal and also communal these issues are. This is not easy stuff, and yet Bolz-Weber insists in a rather belligerent way that we all agree that whatever feels good and doesn''t (seem to) hurt anyone is fine for all...and that God will also be fine with it, because God loves us too much to require more of us than we decide to require of ourselves.

That''s a strange and disappointing approach to faith.

Also frustrating is her breezy dismissal of her divorce. Of course, she is under no obligation to disclose anything about such a personal matter...except that she chose to write a book about a faithful sexual ethic lived within a Christian tradition, which includes marriage and divorce (and sex outside of marriage) right at the heart of the issue. Because of this, she owed her readers some acknowledgement of how complicated it is (or should be) to break vows one has made to another person before God.

I''d hoped for more.
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Julie Burke
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
We really should have brought marshmallows...
Reviewed in the United States on January 29, 2019
Was home from work sick today and my healing came in the mail, read it in one sitting. This book *so* needed to be written. So somehow she manages not to bitch-slap the old guard church''s screwed up views and teachings human sexuality (and a host of other issues addressed... See more
Was home from work sick today and my healing came in the mail, read it in one sitting. This book *so* needed to be written. So somehow she manages not to bitch-slap the old guard church''s screwed up views and teachings human sexuality (and a host of other issues addressed in her book), which, honestly, they freaking deserve. Instead, in the final chapter appropriately called "Benediction", she flings the doors of mercy wide open:

"If the gospel is where we find healing from the harm done to us by the messages of the church, then it must also be where we find freedom. Meaning that even if it is the last thing I want to do, I absolutely have to believe the Gospel is powerful enough, transgressive enough, beautiful enough to heal not only the ones who have been hurt but also those who have done the hurting."

She goes on to ask us to really look at each other on opposing sides: "Do we *see* them? Do we see the ways in which they were in all likelihood trying to be faithful? Do we see the ways in which we, too, may have inadvertently, in our own desire to be faithful, hurt others? I hate that this is God''s economy. That the salvation of my enemy is tied up in my own. Which is why I sometimes say that the Gospel is like, the *worst* good news I''ve ever heard in my life."

It''s time to burn all our secret shame (your body, looks, sexuality, etc.) on little Post-it notes like her church did after a service. We need a massive bonfire of shame and mental f***ed-up-ness. I''ll bring the marshmallows.

Thanks, Nadia.

-Grateful in Houston
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NYfarmer
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Bless You, Nadia, For This Gem of a Book!
Reviewed in the United States on February 18, 2019
As a girl growing up in a conservative Catholic household, I was taught many of the lessons that Nadia mentions in this book (i.e. women who have sex outside of marriage are like chewed gum that no one else will want; women who dress provocatively are guilty of "reverse... See more
As a girl growing up in a conservative Catholic household, I was taught many of the lessons that Nadia mentions in this book (i.e. women who have sex outside of marriage are like chewed gum that no one else will want; women who dress provocatively are guilty of "reverse rape" for making men think impure thoughts; one should never touch oneself on the body parts that are covered by a bathing suit, lest one commit the sin of Onan and be guilty of adultery). I was given these instructions by faithful, well-meaning adults who were doing their best to protect us children from harm, and I know that there are some for whom these types of teachings have been helpful along their spiritual journey. But, I am not one of them. I internalized a deep sense of shame, guilt, and distrust of my body and its desires that has lasted well into adulthood. In large part because of these feelings (and because of the church''s teachings about mortal sin), I have long felt that I am not welcome in the church, such as I am.

...Enter this kickass, empowering, super-important book, which gives voice to all of that! It provides deeper context for the misogyny that has been in many ways perpetrated by church leaders, and offers interpretations of the Bible and of Christian faith that feel far more true to me than what I was taught as a child. I wept about once per chapter, with deep gratitude that someone seemed to understand the devastating complexities that serve to foster sexual shame in Christian communities. This is such a profoundly important conversation - and a timely one, too. Like anything else, the truths in this book will not be recognized or appreciated by everyone. But if you, too, have experienced shame, guilt, or pain related to Christian teachings about your sexuality, please, please pick up a copy of this book. You are not alone!
33 people found this helpful
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Ellis fam
1.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Not a book written from a Biblical / Christian world view.
Reviewed in the United States on May 10, 2019
Dangerous. This book is built on a world view which says there is no truth and everyone is free to discover their own truth. I don''t have a problem with people proposing their own theories and ideas. The problem is when she claims to hold a world view which claims there is... See more
Dangerous. This book is built on a world view which says there is no truth and everyone is free to discover their own truth. I don''t have a problem with people proposing their own theories and ideas. The problem is when she claims to hold a world view which claims there is a God and he is good. She does not hold this world view. She does not write from a Christian / God centered world view yet claims she does. Her world view allows for no outside standard of truth or ethic. For her, truth is built on feelings, bad science, and the ultimate sin is hurting someone''s feelings and / or telling them they are wrong. The end of her deconstructionist and postmodern epistemology is "every man for himself" / "I don''t care how my behavior hurts others," anarchy. She has sold out to pop culture and cool kid crowd. She''s nothing counter cultural but is swimming in the same direction as the other jellyfish.
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Top reviews from other countries

reg_sinclair
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
A Long Overdue Book
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 12, 2019
I think this is one of the most passionate, honest and co m passionate books on faith and sex that I have ever read. I am old; just wish this kind of honesty and compassion had been around fifty years ago.
13 people found this helpful
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J Whitgift
1.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Profoundly disturbing and heretical
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on September 24, 2019
I knew when I cracked open this book that I would not like it, Bolz Weber has a reputation as the shock jock of so called liberal Christianity, and this book helps cement that reputation. Filled with theological errors and heresies masquerading as truth, it is designed to...See more
I knew when I cracked open this book that I would not like it, Bolz Weber has a reputation as the shock jock of so called liberal Christianity, and this book helps cement that reputation. Filled with theological errors and heresies masquerading as truth, it is designed to lead astray the unwary, and those who have chosen the route of error. It is also ignorant of Western Christianity, focusing on so called reformed or evangelical theology, but ignoring (and at times showing a profound and arrogant ignorance of) Catholic doctrine. There heresies are multiple: Individualism linked with Sensualism (the idea that what we like defines what is good for us), antinomianism among them, and she seems to delight in them, proclaiming freedom, but actually binding her followers in the chains of theological ignorance. (Just as Arius and the other heretics did, providing comfortable but heretical untruths, whilst turning people away from the actual, though more difficult to palate truth.) The Bible is a difficult document, and there are those who have been damaged by its misuse and misapplication, but the response to this is not to suggest further misuse and misapplication, but to return to the traditions and theology of Western Catholicism, a tradition which has successfully underpinned Western civilisation for 1,700 years (at least).
6 people found this helpful
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Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Cutting the crap to give wholeness
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 17, 2020
I gave this rating because reading this book is like receiving a hug from God if you happen to have grown up in a church culture which was all about don''t & gave you an unhealthy view of sex and sexuality. This book isn''t saying anything goes but it is saying a whole lot of...See more
I gave this rating because reading this book is like receiving a hug from God if you happen to have grown up in a church culture which was all about don''t & gave you an unhealthy view of sex and sexuality. This book isn''t saying anything goes but it is saying a whole lot of stuff is healthy & normal. There''s alot of great storytelling in this book which seems more mature & settled than some of her earlier writing. This is a pastoral resource rather than an aim to shock book. As a church based community worker with young adults I can''t recommend this highly enough.
5 people found this helpful
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Claire Love
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Let the book do it’s work in you!
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on June 3, 2019
In the blurb on the back, one of the peer-reviews says “..... this will heal many” and Shameless certainly did that for me. Many within me are now whole and if you know what that means then PLEASE read it for yourself. This book will remain in my top three of all time.
6 people found this helpful
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Susan A Putnam
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Refreshing and lovingly challenging
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on August 20, 2019
These days it is rare for me to read a book from cover to cover; to find the time, effort and energy to give a book the attention it deserves. But this book; wow. A thoughtful, engaging, heartfelt read. I am not sure if I agree 100% with all her theological beliefs but I...See more
These days it is rare for me to read a book from cover to cover; to find the time, effort and energy to give a book the attention it deserves. But this book; wow. A thoughtful, engaging, heartfelt read. I am not sure if I agree 100% with all her theological beliefs but I find myself drawn to the warmth and heartfelt conviction of her writing. I will certainly read her other books and look forward to hearing her speak next weekend at greenbelt. Xx
2 people found this helpful
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